It’s not a home when you live alonebleeding rose

The walls suffocate me, holding me captive

My thoughts explode stirring the pot of emotions

An eruption of lust, a blinding spark of madness

I want testosterone in this home

I try to release myself from these mental self-induced

Self-indulging thoughts of pity, I long to escape

Life, loneliness, aging, and dying…alone..

The what ifs, and if only…..

Am I to spend the rest of life being alone?

And inevitably be lonely?

The quietness is a haunting melody

Playing a melon collie tune, from a harp in late afternoon

Each ping on a string breaks my heart

It falls apart, like a wilted rose

Red petals bleeding, saturated with red tears

Can you tell them apart?

They lay splattered between my feet

The air is stagnant; I choke on the gut-wrenching thought

Another cold winter, in a cold bed

I must get this craziness out of my head

If I sleep, when I wake, I will be in my humble abode

Blessed with another day to walk, travel, and play

I wish I knew His plan

11:18 AM